Wednesday, March 4, 2009


I dropped my phone in the toilet today. In honor of this event, I'd like to share the following exchange in which a dear friend relates his own experience with this terrible nightmare:

spencer: HEY
me: yo
spencer: ignorer
me: just dropped my phone int he toliet
spencer: ha! really shitty?
spencer: shirtty?!
me: pissy
spencer: aw man
me: dude
spencer: thought you were gonna join my club
me: and it was top five longest pisses ever
dude shit would be fine no wetness to permeatue
spencer: what the fuck are you talkin
i mean besides the fact that you shit into a bowl of water
2:53 PM
thats usually also full of piss
aside from those things
me: yeah
spencer: which mean wetness is a factor
me: byt theres a chance the phone might rest atop a shit
if it's a solid shit
spencer: dropping iyour phone into a pile of your own shit, sucks
me: im not saying it doesnt
spencer: true but thats one in a million
2:54 PM
me: but at least you have a chance
spencer: when it happened to me
I was in a public bathroom
someone had already KNOCKED
2:55 PM
because I had been in there reading thenews for a while
dropped phone
instinct to plunge hand in after phone takes effect immdiately
whole hand in shit cant get it!
wedged in.... shaft? hole?
2:56 PM
two hands, IN shit everywhere cant get it
take out my knife
knidfe, hand, and other hand, IN
(banging on door) (laughing, sweating)
use knife to pry out phone
2:57 PM
screen is on whole time by the way
wash up and leave, phone works for a little while then kicks the buket
never stops smelling like shit
3:05 PM
me: WOW amazing

Please feel free to send in your own phone in liquid stories. And remember to stay clear of Spencer's hands.


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